", The man looks surprised so the assistant continues, "We have Barbie Goes To the Ball at $19.99, Barbie goes Shopping at $19.99, Barbie goes Clubbing at $19.99, Barbie Goes To The Gym at $19.99, Cyber Barbie at $19.99 and Divorced Barbie at $249.99. Visit our Privacy Policy for more info. A State Trooper pulls a car over on a lonely back road and approaches the blonde lady driver.

"Well, do you know who you are talking to?" ", And so the wife says, "No officer, only when he's drunk.". They wondered if maybe they should get a dog but... Everyone who has ever had a dog knows how important is for a young pup to have friends. What Are The Best Accessories For My 3Doodler 3D Pen? What puzzles us is, why would you bother to borrow $5,000?

This list is a perfect way to start your day, end your week, past time commuting to work or while on your lunch break.

", The shop assistant looks at him in a slightly condescending manner and asks, "All right Sir, which Barbie would that be? We're sorry, but it appears that you are using an anonymous proxy. However, automotive humor is diverse, and not all our car jokes are short; some of our Eddie was driving down the road and met a car coming the other way. What is the similarity between a Ford car and a bathtub? I could get an asthma attack if I blow into that tube.

A big list of carpool jokes! Without a word of protest, the old man quietly left the diner.

We use cookies to collect information from your browser to personalize content and perform site analytics. Both cars are totally demolished, but amazingly neither of them are hurt. I was feeling very sad and left out last week when I realized that I didn’t know any good car jokes. I will just pop open the hood and take a look at the motor." ", The man replied," I agree with you completely. asked the incredulous judge. A car insurance company can tell you how many people will die this year, but a Mafia don, well, he can also tell you every one of their names. - he hadn't bought anything for her. I didn't know about a broken tail light! This contest requires users to be registered in order to vote. There is an abundance of volkswagen jokes out there.

I was attempting to swerve out of its way when it struck my front end. "Well Sir, that's quite obvious!" We're sorry, but it appears that you are using an anonymous proxy. At 11:30 AM the girl sleepily walked into the kitchen, and her father asked her, "Sweetheart, what time did you get in last night?". ", The driver says, "I did... and they had such a great time that today I'm taking them to the beach.".

", Wife: "Oh Harry, you've known about that tail light for weeks!" The pedestrian had no idea which direction to run, so I ran over him.

20 Terribly Funny Car Jokes. A dwarf got out the other car and said, ‘I’m not happy’. Nobody knows exactly how many cars there are in the world, total, but an estimate says that Up until now we have been presenting you with mostly short funny jokes about driving. Travel Jokes - Car Trip Jokes. The car is parked on the street in front of the bank; she has the title and everything checks out. Welcome to this big page filled with funny car jokes! What’s a mixed feeling? "Because I'm an asthmatic, very seriously affected. This list is a perfect way to start your day, end your week, past time commuting to work or while on your lunch break. The officer comes over to check his license. replied the driver. ", Officer: "You were going 75 miles an hour in a 55 mile an hour zone. An invisible car come out of nowhere, struck my car and vanished. Just let me look at the fuse box and I will find the problem." This contest requires users to be registered in order to vote. Why is a Chevrolet an environmentally-friendly car? Hotel Jokes Plane Trip Jokes Others. I told the police that I was not injured, but on removing my hat, found that I had a fractured skull. What you may not know... It’s the middle of winter, and there’s not much going on. See TOP 10 car one liners. One day he decided to take them out... Have you ever felt a rush of panic when your dog slipped away from you? Have you seen the latest Fiat anti-theft gadget? Astonished, the other driver looked in his rear view mirror and swore at Eddie. While you were away, we checked you out and found that you are a multimillionaire.

I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother- in-law, and headed over the embankment.

", "Okay, we'll just get a blood sample down at the station. Absolutely hillarious car one-liners! They are severely damaged.

there are between 800 million and one billion passenger cars and light trucks on the roads, worldwide. Not everybody has your worst interests at heart!

A moment later the second biker walked up to the old man, spat into the old man's milk and then he too took a seat at the counter. ", The Man turns to his wife and yells, "For cryin' out loud, can't you just shut up?! ", Man: "Broken tail light? Taylor Swift and Brendon Urie, hot off their... Coachella Valley Music and Arts Festival is 19 years old and is one of the most important and influential festivals in the world. Then the first engineer who was a mechanical engineer said, "don't worry its probably engine problems. And his response was... "Why don't we just get out of the car, shut all of the doors, and then open them again and get back in and start it!

While they were traveling to their destination the car stalled on them. "Yeah, well, it's just money, rabbi. Then the three engineers looked at the fourth who was a computer engineer. We love car humor, don't you? I think I will just wait for the police. Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.

Good to know that some folks out there use their brain while driving (and crashing). Add CommentsComment and share this joke on Facebook or Twitter, Once there were four engineers traveling in a car. What’s the difference between BMWs and Porcupines? He called a taxi, and soon one arrived at his house. The bank agrees to accept the car as collateral for the loan.

You must complete account validation before submitting jokes.

She replied in a huff, “I wish you guys would get your act together. The man shakes his head, opens it and says, "You take the first drink". Seeing her look at him he said, "I did that by accident. ©Copyright 2016 Jokers Media, LLC - Jokerz and the Jokerz logo are registered trademarks of Jokerz Media, LLC, Comment and share this joke on Facebook or Twitter.

He says to the truck driver, “Got stuck, huh?”, I had a car crash the other day.
And sometimes when you help people your help is what gets them into trouble. You don’t want to get out of either of them whilst other people are watching…. What’s the difference between BMWs and Porcupines? So, he pulls into the parking lot of the next shopping mall he passes, finds a toy store and asks for "A Barbie Doll for my daughter. The next day the guy drives into the filling station and once again the attendant sees the penguins sitting in the front and back seats, and they are all wearing sunglasses and holding towels... "What's this?" I saw a slow-moving, sad-faced old gentleman as he bounced off the hood of my car. ", Man: "Oh, I just took it off when you were walking up to the car. Car ride Jokes- 68 FUN THINGS TO DO AT WAL-MART- Dr. Doolittle- Top 10 things your driving instructor never taught you- The Silent Air Trip- Your Profession and You Here is an awesome collection of not only funny car jokes, but hilarious bumper stickers and very witty car puns! But registering is FREE and don’t worry, we only need a name and e-mail address, and we don’t sell or share your information with any third-parties (see Privacy Policy). They were surprised to find in 49 of the 50 states, the last words of drivers in 61.2 percent of fatal crashes were, "Oh, Shit!" Roadworks caused us to divert our journey. Karen Smith was panicked when her foster puppy slipped... One day in May, Jon and Kayla Patel decided to visit their local shelter. “I’ve had a tough shift,” says the officer. Here another one that might fall under the heading car jokes about driving, but really, it's hardly one of the jokes about cars at all, it's more of those sometimes funny, and most of the time not-so funny barbie jokes: One day a guy was driving home when he suddenly realized that it was his daughter's birthday and - or dear! Cars — they’re a pain to buy, cost you tons in repairs, and constantly put you in danger. And now we are nearing the end of this car jokes and automotive humor collection. We love car humor, don't you?

You must be a registered user to submit a joke. Because the engine never starts. You must be a registered user to submit a joke. Next, here are a few short funny car jokes: You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive. Great Car Jokes and Funny Driving: Automotive Humor at Its Best.
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", The man looks surprised so the assistant continues, "We have Barbie Goes To the Ball at $19.99, Barbie goes Shopping at $19.99, Barbie goes Clubbing at $19.99, Barbie Goes To The Gym at $19.99, Cyber Barbie at $19.99 and Divorced Barbie at $249.99. Visit our Privacy Policy for more info. A State Trooper pulls a car over on a lonely back road and approaches the blonde lady driver.

"Well, do you know who you are talking to?" ", And so the wife says, "No officer, only when he's drunk.". They wondered if maybe they should get a dog but... Everyone who has ever had a dog knows how important is for a young pup to have friends. What Are The Best Accessories For My 3Doodler 3D Pen? What puzzles us is, why would you bother to borrow $5,000?

This list is a perfect way to start your day, end your week, past time commuting to work or while on your lunch break.

", The shop assistant looks at him in a slightly condescending manner and asks, "All right Sir, which Barbie would that be? We're sorry, but it appears that you are using an anonymous proxy. However, automotive humor is diverse, and not all our car jokes are short; some of our Eddie was driving down the road and met a car coming the other way. What is the similarity between a Ford car and a bathtub? I could get an asthma attack if I blow into that tube.

A big list of carpool jokes! Without a word of protest, the old man quietly left the diner.

We use cookies to collect information from your browser to personalize content and perform site analytics. Both cars are totally demolished, but amazingly neither of them are hurt. I was feeling very sad and left out last week when I realized that I didn’t know any good car jokes. I will just pop open the hood and take a look at the motor." ", The man replied," I agree with you completely. asked the incredulous judge. A car insurance company can tell you how many people will die this year, but a Mafia don, well, he can also tell you every one of their names. - he hadn't bought anything for her. I didn't know about a broken tail light! This contest requires users to be registered in order to vote. There is an abundance of volkswagen jokes out there.

I was attempting to swerve out of its way when it struck my front end. "Well Sir, that's quite obvious!" We're sorry, but it appears that you are using an anonymous proxy. At 11:30 AM the girl sleepily walked into the kitchen, and her father asked her, "Sweetheart, what time did you get in last night?". ", The driver says, "I did... and they had such a great time that today I'm taking them to the beach.".

", Wife: "Oh Harry, you've known about that tail light for weeks!" The pedestrian had no idea which direction to run, so I ran over him.

20 Terribly Funny Car Jokes. A dwarf got out the other car and said, ‘I’m not happy’. Nobody knows exactly how many cars there are in the world, total, but an estimate says that Up until now we have been presenting you with mostly short funny jokes about driving. Travel Jokes - Car Trip Jokes. The car is parked on the street in front of the bank; she has the title and everything checks out. Welcome to this big page filled with funny car jokes! What’s a mixed feeling? "Because I'm an asthmatic, very seriously affected. This list is a perfect way to start your day, end your week, past time commuting to work or while on your lunch break. The officer comes over to check his license. replied the driver. ", Officer: "You were going 75 miles an hour in a 55 mile an hour zone. An invisible car come out of nowhere, struck my car and vanished. Just let me look at the fuse box and I will find the problem." This contest requires users to be registered in order to vote. Why is a Chevrolet an environmentally-friendly car? Hotel Jokes Plane Trip Jokes Others. I told the police that I was not injured, but on removing my hat, found that I had a fractured skull. What you may not know... It’s the middle of winter, and there’s not much going on. See TOP 10 car one liners. One day he decided to take them out... Have you ever felt a rush of panic when your dog slipped away from you? Have you seen the latest Fiat anti-theft gadget? Astonished, the other driver looked in his rear view mirror and swore at Eddie. While you were away, we checked you out and found that you are a multimillionaire.

I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother- in-law, and headed over the embankment.

", "Okay, we'll just get a blood sample down at the station. Absolutely hillarious car one-liners! They are severely damaged.

there are between 800 million and one billion passenger cars and light trucks on the roads, worldwide. Not everybody has your worst interests at heart!

A moment later the second biker walked up to the old man, spat into the old man's milk and then he too took a seat at the counter. ", The Man turns to his wife and yells, "For cryin' out loud, can't you just shut up?! ", Man: "Broken tail light? Taylor Swift and Brendon Urie, hot off their... Coachella Valley Music and Arts Festival is 19 years old and is one of the most important and influential festivals in the world. Then the first engineer who was a mechanical engineer said, "don't worry its probably engine problems. And his response was... "Why don't we just get out of the car, shut all of the doors, and then open them again and get back in and start it!

While they were traveling to their destination the car stalled on them. "Yeah, well, it's just money, rabbi. Then the three engineers looked at the fourth who was a computer engineer. We love car humor, don't you? I think I will just wait for the police. Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.

Good to know that some folks out there use their brain while driving (and crashing). Add CommentsComment and share this joke on Facebook or Twitter, Once there were four engineers traveling in a car. What’s the difference between BMWs and Porcupines? He called a taxi, and soon one arrived at his house. The bank agrees to accept the car as collateral for the loan.

You must complete account validation before submitting jokes.

She replied in a huff, “I wish you guys would get your act together. The man shakes his head, opens it and says, "You take the first drink". Seeing her look at him he said, "I did that by accident. ©Copyright 2016 Jokers Media, LLC - Jokerz and the Jokerz logo are registered trademarks of Jokerz Media, LLC, Comment and share this joke on Facebook or Twitter.

He says to the truck driver, “Got stuck, huh?”, I had a car crash the other day.
And sometimes when you help people your help is what gets them into trouble. You don’t want to get out of either of them whilst other people are watching…. What’s the difference between BMWs and Porcupines? So, he pulls into the parking lot of the next shopping mall he passes, finds a toy store and asks for "A Barbie Doll for my daughter. The next day the guy drives into the filling station and once again the attendant sees the penguins sitting in the front and back seats, and they are all wearing sunglasses and holding towels... "What's this?" I saw a slow-moving, sad-faced old gentleman as he bounced off the hood of my car. ", Man: "Oh, I just took it off when you were walking up to the car. Car ride Jokes- 68 FUN THINGS TO DO AT WAL-MART- Dr. Doolittle- Top 10 things your driving instructor never taught you- The Silent Air Trip- Your Profession and You Here is an awesome collection of not only funny car jokes, but hilarious bumper stickers and very witty car puns! But registering is FREE and don’t worry, we only need a name and e-mail address, and we don’t sell or share your information with any third-parties (see Privacy Policy). They were surprised to find in 49 of the 50 states, the last words of drivers in 61.2 percent of fatal crashes were, "Oh, Shit!" Roadworks caused us to divert our journey. Karen Smith was panicked when her foster puppy slipped... One day in May, Jon and Kayla Patel decided to visit their local shelter. “I’ve had a tough shift,” says the officer. Here another one that might fall under the heading car jokes about driving, but really, it's hardly one of the jokes about cars at all, it's more of those sometimes funny, and most of the time not-so funny barbie jokes: One day a guy was driving home when he suddenly realized that it was his daughter's birthday and - or dear! Cars — they’re a pain to buy, cost you tons in repairs, and constantly put you in danger. And now we are nearing the end of this car jokes and automotive humor collection. We love car humor, don't you?

You must be a registered user to submit a joke. Because the engine never starts. You must be a registered user to submit a joke. Next, here are a few short funny car jokes: You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive. Great Car Jokes and Funny Driving: Automotive Humor at Its Best.
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", The man looks surprised so the assistant continues, "We have Barbie Goes To the Ball at $19.99, Barbie goes Shopping at $19.99, Barbie goes Clubbing at $19.99, Barbie Goes To The Gym at $19.99, Cyber Barbie at $19.99 and Divorced Barbie at $249.99. Visit our Privacy Policy for more info. A State Trooper pulls a car over on a lonely back road and approaches the blonde lady driver.

"Well, do you know who you are talking to?" ", And so the wife says, "No officer, only when he's drunk.". They wondered if maybe they should get a dog but... Everyone who has ever had a dog knows how important is for a young pup to have friends. What Are The Best Accessories For My 3Doodler 3D Pen? What puzzles us is, why would you bother to borrow $5,000?

This list is a perfect way to start your day, end your week, past time commuting to work or while on your lunch break.

", The shop assistant looks at him in a slightly condescending manner and asks, "All right Sir, which Barbie would that be? We're sorry, but it appears that you are using an anonymous proxy. However, automotive humor is diverse, and not all our car jokes are short; some of our Eddie was driving down the road and met a car coming the other way. What is the similarity between a Ford car and a bathtub? I could get an asthma attack if I blow into that tube.

A big list of carpool jokes! Without a word of protest, the old man quietly left the diner.

We use cookies to collect information from your browser to personalize content and perform site analytics. Both cars are totally demolished, but amazingly neither of them are hurt. I was feeling very sad and left out last week when I realized that I didn’t know any good car jokes. I will just pop open the hood and take a look at the motor." ", The man replied," I agree with you completely. asked the incredulous judge. A car insurance company can tell you how many people will die this year, but a Mafia don, well, he can also tell you every one of their names. - he hadn't bought anything for her. I didn't know about a broken tail light! This contest requires users to be registered in order to vote. There is an abundance of volkswagen jokes out there.

I was attempting to swerve out of its way when it struck my front end. "Well Sir, that's quite obvious!" We're sorry, but it appears that you are using an anonymous proxy. At 11:30 AM the girl sleepily walked into the kitchen, and her father asked her, "Sweetheart, what time did you get in last night?". ", The driver says, "I did... and they had such a great time that today I'm taking them to the beach.".

", Wife: "Oh Harry, you've known about that tail light for weeks!" The pedestrian had no idea which direction to run, so I ran over him.

20 Terribly Funny Car Jokes. A dwarf got out the other car and said, ‘I’m not happy’. Nobody knows exactly how many cars there are in the world, total, but an estimate says that Up until now we have been presenting you with mostly short funny jokes about driving. Travel Jokes - Car Trip Jokes. The car is parked on the street in front of the bank; she has the title and everything checks out. Welcome to this big page filled with funny car jokes! What’s a mixed feeling? "Because I'm an asthmatic, very seriously affected. This list is a perfect way to start your day, end your week, past time commuting to work or while on your lunch break. The officer comes over to check his license. replied the driver. ", Officer: "You were going 75 miles an hour in a 55 mile an hour zone. An invisible car come out of nowhere, struck my car and vanished. Just let me look at the fuse box and I will find the problem." This contest requires users to be registered in order to vote. Why is a Chevrolet an environmentally-friendly car? Hotel Jokes Plane Trip Jokes Others. I told the police that I was not injured, but on removing my hat, found that I had a fractured skull. What you may not know... It’s the middle of winter, and there’s not much going on. See TOP 10 car one liners. One day he decided to take them out... Have you ever felt a rush of panic when your dog slipped away from you? Have you seen the latest Fiat anti-theft gadget? Astonished, the other driver looked in his rear view mirror and swore at Eddie. While you were away, we checked you out and found that you are a multimillionaire.

I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother- in-law, and headed over the embankment.

", "Okay, we'll just get a blood sample down at the station. Absolutely hillarious car one-liners! They are severely damaged.

there are between 800 million and one billion passenger cars and light trucks on the roads, worldwide. Not everybody has your worst interests at heart!

A moment later the second biker walked up to the old man, spat into the old man's milk and then he too took a seat at the counter. ", The Man turns to his wife and yells, "For cryin' out loud, can't you just shut up?! ", Man: "Broken tail light? Taylor Swift and Brendon Urie, hot off their... Coachella Valley Music and Arts Festival is 19 years old and is one of the most important and influential festivals in the world. Then the first engineer who was a mechanical engineer said, "don't worry its probably engine problems. And his response was... "Why don't we just get out of the car, shut all of the doors, and then open them again and get back in and start it!

While they were traveling to their destination the car stalled on them. "Yeah, well, it's just money, rabbi. Then the three engineers looked at the fourth who was a computer engineer. We love car humor, don't you? I think I will just wait for the police. Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.

Good to know that some folks out there use their brain while driving (and crashing). Add CommentsComment and share this joke on Facebook or Twitter, Once there were four engineers traveling in a car. What’s the difference between BMWs and Porcupines? He called a taxi, and soon one arrived at his house. The bank agrees to accept the car as collateral for the loan.

You must complete account validation before submitting jokes.

She replied in a huff, “I wish you guys would get your act together. The man shakes his head, opens it and says, "You take the first drink". Seeing her look at him he said, "I did that by accident. ©Copyright 2016 Jokers Media, LLC - Jokerz and the Jokerz logo are registered trademarks of Jokerz Media, LLC, Comment and share this joke on Facebook or Twitter.

He says to the truck driver, “Got stuck, huh?”, I had a car crash the other day.
And sometimes when you help people your help is what gets them into trouble. You don’t want to get out of either of them whilst other people are watching…. What’s the difference between BMWs and Porcupines? So, he pulls into the parking lot of the next shopping mall he passes, finds a toy store and asks for "A Barbie Doll for my daughter. The next day the guy drives into the filling station and once again the attendant sees the penguins sitting in the front and back seats, and they are all wearing sunglasses and holding towels... "What's this?" I saw a slow-moving, sad-faced old gentleman as he bounced off the hood of my car. ", Man: "Oh, I just took it off when you were walking up to the car. Car ride Jokes- 68 FUN THINGS TO DO AT WAL-MART- Dr. Doolittle- Top 10 things your driving instructor never taught you- The Silent Air Trip- Your Profession and You Here is an awesome collection of not only funny car jokes, but hilarious bumper stickers and very witty car puns! But registering is FREE and don’t worry, we only need a name and e-mail address, and we don’t sell or share your information with any third-parties (see Privacy Policy). They were surprised to find in 49 of the 50 states, the last words of drivers in 61.2 percent of fatal crashes were, "Oh, Shit!" Roadworks caused us to divert our journey. Karen Smith was panicked when her foster puppy slipped... One day in May, Jon and Kayla Patel decided to visit their local shelter. “I’ve had a tough shift,” says the officer. Here another one that might fall under the heading car jokes about driving, but really, it's hardly one of the jokes about cars at all, it's more of those sometimes funny, and most of the time not-so funny barbie jokes: One day a guy was driving home when he suddenly realized that it was his daughter's birthday and - or dear! Cars — they’re a pain to buy, cost you tons in repairs, and constantly put you in danger. And now we are nearing the end of this car jokes and automotive humor collection. We love car humor, don't you?

You must be a registered user to submit a joke. Because the engine never starts. You must be a registered user to submit a joke. Next, here are a few short funny car jokes: You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive. Great Car Jokes and Funny Driving: Automotive Humor at Its Best.
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Add CommentsComment and share this joke on Facebook or Twitter.

So your hands stay warm when you’re pushing it back home in the winter. A good thing, then, is that the automobile industry is (slowly) moving toward hybrid cars and hydrogen cars with a much better carbon footprint. Great Car Jokes and Funny Driving: Automotive Humor at Its Best, Great Car Jokes and Funny Driving: Automotive Humor at Its Best.
I thought my window was down, but I found out it was up when I put my head through it. A number that is actually rising fairly fast because more cars are arriving quickly in India and Asia, most particularly China. I don’t feel like more paperwork so if you can give me an excuse for your driving that I haven’t heard before you can go!” “Uh , last week my wife ran off with a cop,” says Ken. But registering is FREE and don’t worry, we only need a name and e-mail address, and we don’t sell or share your information with any third-parties (see Privacy Policy). Thinking how important automobiles are to the Western way of life, the amount of funny jokes and good driving jokes to be found is relatively small - … The easiest way to make your old car run better, is to check the prices of a new car.

Hotel Jokes Plane Trip Jokes Others. And when an intruder was brought into her litter, Gwen the mother cat did nothing... Ingrid Michaelson: ‘Time Machine’ Music Video Review, All Time Low: ‘Kids in the Dark’ Music Video Review, Kelly Clarkson Draws Inspiration from Aretha Franklin on New Album, Jess Glynne: ‘Don’t Be So Hard On Yourself’ Music Video Review, 4 New Books About Music Perfect for Winter Snowstorms, The 10 Best Fictional Bands: Jem, St. Pepper, The Folksmen and More, The Surprising Stories Behind America’s Favorite Patriotic Songs, Personalised Last Minute Presents for Your Loved Ones. ", She replied, "Oh, yes, I know that, daddy. asked the driver. The Attendant notices that the front and back seats of the car are occupied by penguins. And while we're at it, here are another couple of Very Funny Jokes that aren't exactly very funny clean jokes: A family of three are driving behind a garbage truck when a dildo flies out and thumps against the windscreen. 47 of them, in fact!

", The man looks surprised so the assistant continues, "We have Barbie Goes To the Ball at $19.99, Barbie goes Shopping at $19.99, Barbie goes Clubbing at $19.99, Barbie Goes To The Gym at $19.99, Cyber Barbie at $19.99 and Divorced Barbie at $249.99. Visit our Privacy Policy for more info. A State Trooper pulls a car over on a lonely back road and approaches the blonde lady driver.

"Well, do you know who you are talking to?" ", And so the wife says, "No officer, only when he's drunk.". They wondered if maybe they should get a dog but... Everyone who has ever had a dog knows how important is for a young pup to have friends. What Are The Best Accessories For My 3Doodler 3D Pen? What puzzles us is, why would you bother to borrow $5,000?

This list is a perfect way to start your day, end your week, past time commuting to work or while on your lunch break.

", The shop assistant looks at him in a slightly condescending manner and asks, "All right Sir, which Barbie would that be? We're sorry, but it appears that you are using an anonymous proxy. However, automotive humor is diverse, and not all our car jokes are short; some of our Eddie was driving down the road and met a car coming the other way. What is the similarity between a Ford car and a bathtub? I could get an asthma attack if I blow into that tube.

A big list of carpool jokes! Without a word of protest, the old man quietly left the diner.

We use cookies to collect information from your browser to personalize content and perform site analytics. Both cars are totally demolished, but amazingly neither of them are hurt. I was feeling very sad and left out last week when I realized that I didn’t know any good car jokes. I will just pop open the hood and take a look at the motor." ", The man replied," I agree with you completely. asked the incredulous judge. A car insurance company can tell you how many people will die this year, but a Mafia don, well, he can also tell you every one of their names. - he hadn't bought anything for her. I didn't know about a broken tail light! This contest requires users to be registered in order to vote. There is an abundance of volkswagen jokes out there.

I was attempting to swerve out of its way when it struck my front end. "Well Sir, that's quite obvious!" We're sorry, but it appears that you are using an anonymous proxy. At 11:30 AM the girl sleepily walked into the kitchen, and her father asked her, "Sweetheart, what time did you get in last night?". ", The driver says, "I did... and they had such a great time that today I'm taking them to the beach.".

", Wife: "Oh Harry, you've known about that tail light for weeks!" The pedestrian had no idea which direction to run, so I ran over him.

20 Terribly Funny Car Jokes. A dwarf got out the other car and said, ‘I’m not happy’. Nobody knows exactly how many cars there are in the world, total, but an estimate says that Up until now we have been presenting you with mostly short funny jokes about driving. Travel Jokes - Car Trip Jokes. The car is parked on the street in front of the bank; she has the title and everything checks out. Welcome to this big page filled with funny car jokes! What’s a mixed feeling? "Because I'm an asthmatic, very seriously affected. This list is a perfect way to start your day, end your week, past time commuting to work or while on your lunch break. The officer comes over to check his license. replied the driver. ", Officer: "You were going 75 miles an hour in a 55 mile an hour zone. An invisible car come out of nowhere, struck my car and vanished. Just let me look at the fuse box and I will find the problem." This contest requires users to be registered in order to vote. Why is a Chevrolet an environmentally-friendly car? Hotel Jokes Plane Trip Jokes Others. I told the police that I was not injured, but on removing my hat, found that I had a fractured skull. What you may not know... It’s the middle of winter, and there’s not much going on. See TOP 10 car one liners. One day he decided to take them out... Have you ever felt a rush of panic when your dog slipped away from you? Have you seen the latest Fiat anti-theft gadget? Astonished, the other driver looked in his rear view mirror and swore at Eddie. While you were away, we checked you out and found that you are a multimillionaire.

I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother- in-law, and headed over the embankment.

", "Okay, we'll just get a blood sample down at the station. Absolutely hillarious car one-liners! They are severely damaged.

there are between 800 million and one billion passenger cars and light trucks on the roads, worldwide. Not everybody has your worst interests at heart!

A moment later the second biker walked up to the old man, spat into the old man's milk and then he too took a seat at the counter. ", The Man turns to his wife and yells, "For cryin' out loud, can't you just shut up?! ", Man: "Broken tail light? Taylor Swift and Brendon Urie, hot off their... Coachella Valley Music and Arts Festival is 19 years old and is one of the most important and influential festivals in the world. Then the first engineer who was a mechanical engineer said, "don't worry its probably engine problems. And his response was... "Why don't we just get out of the car, shut all of the doors, and then open them again and get back in and start it!

While they were traveling to their destination the car stalled on them. "Yeah, well, it's just money, rabbi. Then the three engineers looked at the fourth who was a computer engineer. We love car humor, don't you? I think I will just wait for the police. Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.

Good to know that some folks out there use their brain while driving (and crashing). Add CommentsComment and share this joke on Facebook or Twitter, Once there were four engineers traveling in a car. What’s the difference between BMWs and Porcupines? He called a taxi, and soon one arrived at his house. The bank agrees to accept the car as collateral for the loan.

You must complete account validation before submitting jokes.

She replied in a huff, “I wish you guys would get your act together. The man shakes his head, opens it and says, "You take the first drink". Seeing her look at him he said, "I did that by accident. ©Copyright 2016 Jokers Media, LLC - Jokerz and the Jokerz logo are registered trademarks of Jokerz Media, LLC, Comment and share this joke on Facebook or Twitter.

He says to the truck driver, “Got stuck, huh?”, I had a car crash the other day.
And sometimes when you help people your help is what gets them into trouble. You don’t want to get out of either of them whilst other people are watching…. What’s the difference between BMWs and Porcupines? So, he pulls into the parking lot of the next shopping mall he passes, finds a toy store and asks for "A Barbie Doll for my daughter. The next day the guy drives into the filling station and once again the attendant sees the penguins sitting in the front and back seats, and they are all wearing sunglasses and holding towels... "What's this?" I saw a slow-moving, sad-faced old gentleman as he bounced off the hood of my car. ", Man: "Oh, I just took it off when you were walking up to the car. Car ride Jokes- 68 FUN THINGS TO DO AT WAL-MART- Dr. Doolittle- Top 10 things your driving instructor never taught you- The Silent Air Trip- Your Profession and You Here is an awesome collection of not only funny car jokes, but hilarious bumper stickers and very witty car puns! But registering is FREE and don’t worry, we only need a name and e-mail address, and we don’t sell or share your information with any third-parties (see Privacy Policy). They were surprised to find in 49 of the 50 states, the last words of drivers in 61.2 percent of fatal crashes were, "Oh, Shit!" Roadworks caused us to divert our journey. Karen Smith was panicked when her foster puppy slipped... One day in May, Jon and Kayla Patel decided to visit their local shelter. “I’ve had a tough shift,” says the officer. Here another one that might fall under the heading car jokes about driving, but really, it's hardly one of the jokes about cars at all, it's more of those sometimes funny, and most of the time not-so funny barbie jokes: One day a guy was driving home when he suddenly realized that it was his daughter's birthday and - or dear! Cars — they’re a pain to buy, cost you tons in repairs, and constantly put you in danger. And now we are nearing the end of this car jokes and automotive humor collection. We love car humor, don't you?

You must be a registered user to submit a joke. Because the engine never starts. You must be a registered user to submit a joke. Next, here are a few short funny car jokes: You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive. Great Car Jokes and Funny Driving: Automotive Humor at Its Best.

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